One day this lady shows up at the country club and signs up for golf lessons. She's decided to impress her husband by learning the game. She meets up at the first hole with the club golf pro.

He goes over the finer points with the woman, hands her a iron, gets her lined up to tee off and lets her take a whack at the ball. "pumphf"....the ball goes 2 feet. He lines her up again, she swings...

"thwack"...

the ball goes about 10 ft. This repeats several more times, many times she misses completely. The golf pro is more than frustruated by now, so he decides to take a different approach.

"ok lady, what you want to do is grab hold of that club like you do your husband's d**k at night and hit that ball!" "Kablam!!" the ball goes 240 yards.

The gold pro is in awe.

He turns to the lady and says.. "that's awesome, now if you'll take that club out of your mouth, we'll work on your putting"