A bald guy with a wood leg get invited to a Halloween party. He doesn't know what costume to wear to hide his head and his leg, so he writes to a custume company to explain his problem.

A few days later he receives a package with the following note: Please find enclosed a pirates outfit. The spotted handkerchief will cover your bald head, and with your wooden leg, you will be the perfect pirate. The guy gets enraged that they emphasized his wooden leg, so he writes a letter of complaint.

A week later he receives another package , another note: Please find enclosed a monk's habit.

The long rob will cover your wooden leg, and with your bald head, you will certainly look the part. Now the guy is really upsetsince they went from emphasizing his wooden leg to emphasizing his bald head, so he writes the company another nasty letter. The next week he receives a small package and this note: Please find the enclosed bottle of molasses.Pour the molasses over your bald head, stick your wooden leg up your ass, and go as a carmel apple.