A guy goes to a renowned reconstructive surgeon for penile enlargement. After the operation, he eagerly awaits removal of the bandages, and is shocked to find his member is the same size as ever.

"Hey, doc!" he yells when the surgeon makes rounds, "how come I'm not any bigger?" "Well, sir, " the surgeon says soothingly, "you have just been given the latest penile prosthesis--it works on demand. I mean, you don't want to have to get all new clothes, do ya? Let me show you how it works: just open and close your knees a few times.

" Suddenly, our hero's d**k is the size of a french bread! "Now just squeeze your knees together for a count of five." And things return to normal. "Doc, THAT is amazing! When can I...

ya know...

" "Test-drive it?", winks the doctor. "You're good to go tonight." Guy goes to a singles bar that night and sees a nice-looking, vaguely familiar woman at the other end of the bar and decides to approach her. "Hi, there, " he calls, knocking his knees together a few times, "have we met before?" "Not exactly, " she says, flapping her arms, "we have the same doctor."